STOP TELLING ME TO GIVE DRAGON'S CROWN A CHANCE!!

As you all know I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE The disgusting, repulsive and insulting character model of the Sorceress chick in Dragon's Crown, and to a lesser extent the Amazon Warrior as well. I've refused to purchase or play the game because of it.

A while back the game was free with PS+ and I happened to add it to my account like I do pretty much all the PS+ games because DAMMIT I'm paying for Plus aren't I? However I never played the game.
Now, I've gotten a lot of shit on several sites for my mild boycott of Dragon's Crown due to the character models.
I've been told to "lighten up" because that's just the artist' "style". I've been told that I "don't have to play as those characters if I find them SOOO offensive. there are other characters" I've been told that I "should give the game a chance" before I criticize.

I thought about all that long and hard...and as someone who plays games that are sometimes off the beaten path and not well known I felt that...well...maybe there is truth to that.

After all nothing chaps my ass as much as someone talking shit about Hatoful Boyfriend or Hakuoki when they have no damn clue what they are about and are merely judging them on a few screens and what they perceive the genre to be about.

So I decided to swallow my ire and try the damn game....after all there ARE other characters right? and everyone tells me the game is better than a bathtub full of Nutella so..fine...ok...

I'm here to tell you right now...
FUCK ALL OF YOU AND DON'T EVER TELL ME TO GIVE THIS FUCKING GAME OR ANY GAME A FUCKING CHANCE AGAIN....
EVER.

Let me run down my experience real quick here...

I chose the Magician. Why? Because he didn't have disgusting tits and giant cellulite thighs and ass exposed and he does magic...and I love magic.

I go through all the basic shit and am given a "tour" of the town and all is well til the shop.
More giant tits shoved in my face unnecessarily...Wonderful. But, I soldier on.

I reach a point where I find out that I can add more characters to my party. You get these characters by picking up bone in dungeons and bringing them to the church to be resurrected. You don't know who these bones will be til you get to the cathedral. I picked up 2 sets of bones and when i go to resurrect them...Its 1 pin headed warrior guy and that hamhock thighed she beast Amazon. I opted to just be short people and only chose the pin head until eventually I was able to pick up bones for another wizard and the only sensibly dressed female of the lot, the archer.
So all's well that ends well, right?

Wrong.

When you complete a quest from the guild you unlock a small written story and some art. Well that's kinda cool, isn't it?
Yeah, it was...until the second quest I completed...

Seriously?
For real?

No lie?

You think THIS is what I want as a payoff for completing a fucking quest?
A grotesque looking, mostly naked elf slut?

This is unnecessary. It adds NOTHING to the story or the enjoyment of the story. Its gratuitous bullshit. And the worst part is...there's no escaping it beyond turning the game off.

I gave the game a fair shake. I decided I wouldn't "talk shit" if I hadn't actually given the game a try and decided I would "just play a different character if that one offends" me.
But that didn't stop the game from shoving its juvenile fantasies in my face, did it?
So now, y'all can STFU.
Veni Vidi and think its disgusting pandering crap.

SO DONE!
Oh and for the record, I think the gameplay is pretty shit too...so no great loss to my collection there.

Sweet Fuse: At Your Side....Well this is awkward...

So I decided to play Sweet Fuse.
Y'all have probably never heard of it so I'll give you a brief summary.
Its an Otome game, which means its a visual novel geared towards women, like Hakuoki.
You are the female protagonist and through the course of the story based on your choices you will win the heart of one of the male leads.
Like Hakouki, its actually got a pretty interesting if odd story and if you can get past the "reverse harem" situation I think its a game anyone can enjoy. Though its certainly not as..deep as Hakuoki.

I'm not going to go into details on the off chance someone might want to play this for themselves but I'll give you the basic premise along wit the one tiny thing that dampens my enjoyment of the game...

the premise is...quirky. You are Saki Inafune, the niece of game creator Keiji Inafune. Your uncle has decided to open a theme park based on his video games (this is an awesome idea, why has no one done this?! I demand a gaming theme park dammit!!!)

On opening day during the opening ceremonies some guy? dressed as a pig blows up the ferris wheel and takes your uncle and the other suits hostage. He explains that he's gonna blow up the damn park. But to make it fun and interesting he will choose 7 people to participate in a game he's devised.
The game is as follows:

There are 7 bombs in 7 attractions throughout the park. Every day for 7 days the 7 chosen people will have to go into one of these attractions and will have 7 hours to figure out the puzzles inside. If they do not figure it out in 7 hours the bomb in that attraction will go off, killing them. If they do solve it then thats a wrap for the day and the next day they will do it all again in  new attraction.

Saki volunteers to be part of the game in order to try and save her uncle and is brought together with 6 guys of varying degrees of hotness and sterotypes.

Last night I managed to get through 1 romance route, that of a fortune teller named Urabe and that's where things get weird for me.
The guys ages range from 17-32...and honestly, for once in a game of this art style, they look it.
My choice, Urabe is 26.
Saki's age is given as 18 but...yeah, i don't buy it. She looks 14...maybe 16 at most. (the bowl haircut isn't helping at all)
If you're familiar with these types of games , they're pretty tame and the big "payoff" is usually a kiss...So...picture a guy who looks mid to late 20s kissing a girl that looks 14...its a bit...squiggy
.
Its so eww that another character on finding out there was something going between the MC and Urabe got pretty upset and mentioned the inappropriateness of them even kissing, much less anything else.
And yet, there's a guy even older than him as one of the romance options. (the oldest character as i mentioned earlier is 32)

Had they made the main character a bit older...or even just...I don't know...made her look less like a 12yr old, it would have made the game much more enjoyable. But, I'm in it now so I'm gonna go feel like an icky perv and romance that old guy!

Akiba's Trip...I should have spent my money on bubble gum and cardboard instead

I hurt my wrist beating up 48 idols in a row. Man those bitches were annoying.
48...that really seems like an unfair number.

While i'm still playing the damn thing I've decided Akiba's Trip is a shitty game. No, not just because of the 48 bitches I had to fight in 1 damn fight, though that was really fucking annoying and my wrist really does hurt (it aggravated my carpal tunnel).
Its more because the game is just..meh.

First, loading screens..EVERY FIVE FUCKING SECONDS. While Akihabara might be faithfully reproduced It isn't fluidly reproduced. Every time you walk half a block its a new area and you're hit with a loading screen. Sometimes, you didn't wanna go to another area but you just kinda ran into the barrier between them and so now its gonna be TWO loading screens. One to get you there and one to get you back to where you wanted to be.

Even worse is the pop up. Whenever you go anywhere it takes a few seconds for the people to just appear out of nowhere. So if you're looking for someone...well good fucking luck because you might be standing where they are supposed to pop up and therefore, you won't see them.

Add to this that side missions are timed, and timed in the most annoying manner...
You get a side mission, if you haven't done it after a bit you get an email annoying you, telling you the person is going to cancel their request if you don't fucking hurry up and get it done. If you don't get it done immediately after that email, you will fail it and there isn't a big gap of time between the email and failure...and no it doesn't give you a time limit that you can actually measure or see. Just "hurry up and do this or you fail...oops...not fast enough fission mailed"

Then there's the combat..The whole point of the thing...stripping idiots clothing off...well it really isn't as fun as you would think.
There are different weapons and each one is completely shitty.

Example... Computer Monitor if you choose a low strike, you squat down and bash your own head with the monitor and if you are lucky this causes minor damage to your opponent, if he's standing close enough to you...WHAT?
Combat Gloves....how do you fuck this up? By making the low strike button launch my character into some weird sort of planking move that is useless and leaves me wide open. By making the high strike cause my character to hold his arms up in victory before attempting some slow  drunken lunging swing that ALWAYS misses and ALWAYS gets my ass beat.

combat goes like this... Punch guy a few times in pants...run away and heal...try to punch guy and instead do a stupid useless move that gets me beat down...run away and heal...try to hold down the button to throw a punch and avoid stupid useless animation and instead try to grab clothes that aren't ready to be stripped, play tug of war with the enemy and lose..repeat this over and over and over again for every single enemy you encounter.

Its not fun, its not funny and "Synthisters" is a really fucking stupid name for man made vampires....man made vampires is a stupid thing too...This game is fucking dumb and shitty. Even Conception is better. At least Conception is funny.

What I've been playing

 Wow, its been ages since I've written anything here. I didn't forget this place I just  couldn't think of anything to write.
I've been going through another "internet burnout" period. Took a time out for a while from my facebook page as well and just recently started posting regularly again.

What have I been doing all this time?

Nacho...pure sexy!

Well, life stuff of course. Family, dogs, gaming. My usual stuff.
We got a third dog and his name is Nacho and he's the sexiest Chihuahua ever! He gets along well with Tater,our scruffy mutt but for some reason he just isn't feeling the love with Meatball (probably because Meatball was the original sexy beast and Nacho is stealing his title). So I spend my time breaking up doggie drama and having a dogtourage follow me around the house. Hard not to feel gangsta with a dogtourage behind me.

I've actually been gaming a lot more lately than I used to, mostly on my Vita.
Just so you know, Warriors Orochi 3 Ultimate is like crack. CRACK I TELL YOU! but I'm getting ahead of myself.

Lets see, what have I played lately?

I started playing Hakuoki on PS3 but I ended up getting the worst cold/flu in history and set it aside only to get sidetracked with other stuff. I'll get around to it eventually. I was actually really enjoying the additional stories they added to it since I've already played the basic story 3 times over 3 other games. I think I'm a little Hakuoki'd out for the time being. Though I still love it to bits.

After I set that aside I finally got around to finishing Tales of The Abyss...only took me what? 3 years? Man that was a fabulous game.
I tried to get back into SMT Devil Survivor Overclocked and quickly discovered why I had put it down ages ago. I'm stuck at a really shitty battle, (which is the same reason i stopped playing FFX) some day I SHALL be victorious dammit!

When my Flu hit round 2 I decided to go with Tales of Xillia since I bought Tales of Xillia 2 and kinda feel like I should maybe make an effort to try to get through them both. I think I'm about 2/3rds through Xillia and its really great, except for Milla. I cannot stand the character and I cannot stand the voice acting for her. Everything else is absolutely wonderful.

I probably would have continued playing Xillia to the end if Danganronpa 2 hadn't come out. Burned through that one in a few days. That was an experience. It was just as good as the first one and had just as many annoyances. I know this sounds like a weird thing to say about a game but...I wish it had LESS gameplay.

For those not familiar with Danganronpa its like...Persona 4 and Phoenix Wright had a psychopathic baby...I guess I should explain...

The premise is like this:
You and a bunch of other students are locked in a school with no means of escape. Your captor/headmaster is a sadistic stuffed bear named Monokuma. The only way to get out of this place is to murder someone and get away with it. Which is where the actual gameplay comes in.
You spend your days talking to the other students and giving them gifts in order to get to know them better (like a super simplified version of P4 social links). Eventually someone gets killed and you begin the investigation phase of the game. You question people, look for evidence, the usual type of stuff. Once that's done a class trial begins. You must use the evidence you've gathered to find the guilty party. If the killer is discovered he/she will be punished (executed in a horrible way). the twist is, if the killer is NOT discovered they will go free and the rest of the students will be executed.
This is all well and good but the actual trial mechanics can be a bit of a chore and they bring down the awesomeness of the game/story a bit.

The sequel is much the same except that instead of a school its a group of people on a handful of  deserted islands.

Once I got over the mind-fuck that was Danganronpa 2 I dove straight into Dynasty Warriors 8 Extreme Legends because anyone who knows me knows I fucking LOVE THE SHIT outta DW, Sima Yi in particular (I have no idea why, don't judge). For the record DW 8 is definitely worth the price of admission, I'm actually planning on picking up a ps3 copy eventually because Lu Bu deserves a large screen dammit!
I was in the middle of K.O.ing many many identical dudes when I got Conception  2 in the mail...I seriously need to write a whole 'nother entry just for Conception 2...its just too much to go into now..too much weirdness I mean.

Sadly once you get past the "shock value" of "Classmating" and weirdness the game gets pretty tedious and repetitious and I set it aside in order to finish the last 2 DLCs for Muramasa Rebirth. I managed to complete those the same day Warriors Orochi 3 came out and ever since then its been my crack. I think its been like a month or so since it came out and I've been playing it pretty much every day. Still haven't even touched the mountain of DLC I bought for it.

I also recently started playing Hatoful Boyfriend. If you haven't heard of that one either, I don't blame you, its pretty niche.
Its a VN about a girl who is the only human going to an all bird school. So all the boys you make friends with/romance/whatever are actually pigeons. I know, I know, it sounds beyond bizarre. But honestly, once you get past the whole pigeon thing and the horrible bird puns, its pretty good. So far i've gotten 4 out of 14 endings and i'm looking forward to hopefully answering many of the questions I currently have.

I think thats about it...
Oh wait no.. Last night I started Hatsune Miku: Project DIVA f and realized I have zero hand/eye coordination.

Coming up soon....
I'm thinking of picking up Akiba's Trip tonight though I'm not sure when I'll get around to that and I've pre-ordered  Tales of Hearts R and Persona Q which are both coming out next month.

I did pick up Persona 4 Arena Ultimax recently but I haven't played it yet. I still haven't finished the first one though I did make some progress on it a couple weeks ago. As much as I like Persona Arena I really think it should be called something other than a fighting game. Its more like 20 minutes of text/dialogue punctuated by the occasional 20 second fight. I'm not complaining, its a lot of fun and its interesting but, its not really a fighting game.

Speaking of fighting games, I suck at them and I can't say I like any of them besides Soul Calibur but a while back I bought Injustice: Gods Among Us while it was on sale for Vita and its fantastic. Surprisingly good story and really fun. Even for a spaz like me.

What have we learned today?
That's right, I buy and play too many games and I really suck at them and that's why I never finish any of them.

If I can unglue myself from WO3 long enough and slow my brain down enough to get actual coherent thoughts going I'll probably write a bit about Conception 2 soon, I just didn't want to make this post much longer than it already is...plus its lunch time and i'm hungry!

SPOILERS How long is ok?

Yesterday I was playing SR4. When I finished I went through my screenshots to pick the ones I wanted to upload to Steam. Once I chose my screenshots I proceeded to check off the Spoiler Tag box. My son, Frog, asks me "Why are you doing that?"
"So that the screenshots will have a black box over them, Frog."
"Why would you do that?"
"So people will have to click on it to see the picture."
"Why?"
"Because maybe other people haven't played it yet."
"Why does that matter?"
Why do kids ask so many damn questions and why do they all start with "Why"???
Patience wearing thin I try to get the entire explanation out before he interrupts me with another "why" again.
"Because Frog, maybe other people haven't played it yet and I don't want to spoil the game for them because thats considered rude and and mean. If you play a game you wanna find out what happens on your own."
Feeling exhausted from saying all that without taking a breath and happy that he'll stop asking questions now that I'v answered him fully I look at him and he just looks at me like I'm SOOOOO DUMB.
He rolls his eyes and says "Why would it matter? the games been out forever. Its OLD." then he just went off to play Castle Crashers thoroughly disgusted with me for being so stupid.
(For the record the game has been out a year)

So..How long should you legit expect spoiler warnings?

I mean, example...someone once yelled at me for spoiling FF7 (Aerith dies!) and I'm not talking about years ago. I'm talking about maybe ONE year ago. Look people, I haven't even slogged through all of FF7 and I know she dies and I am utterly unaffected by said spoiler because its been a billion years since the game came out.

I was however thoroughly pissed when Borderlands 2 came out and someone posted a big ole screenshot spoiling an important plot point about my favorite character TWO WEEKS after the game came out. I think I had a right to be pissed.

Back in the day games came out sporadically, you had some time to save up for the next big game and pick it up. Not only that but these were the days before internet or in the infancy of the internet so, you didn't see EVERYTHING about a game in your face 24/7. Spoilers were harder to come by and you had time to catch up with everyone else.
But now, when games come out 10 a week on Steam. When everywhere you look, people are posting pics and comments and videos everywhere...can you still expect spoiler free gaming? For how long?

I try to be really really good about spoilers because I HATE HATE HATE spoilers. So, I like to err on the side of caution. If its a story point in a game, regardless how old the game is I will first ask a person if they want a spoiler, or I'll use the spoiler tag on Steam for my screenshots. But I can't expect everyone to do the same, right?

AAA games obviously get more exposure, more players and therefore are more prone to early spoilers. Indie games perhaps not so much though...honestly, am I the only one that feels Indie games are now more "mainstream" than AAA games? Guess that's a rant for another time though.

Ok so AAA games, big names, lots of people, lots of coverage. How long is reasonable? While i'd like to say "forever" as in, be cautious and ask a person first before divulging plot points, I know thats impossible so, reasonably speaking... 6 months?
No blatant spoilers without asking first for the first 6 months post release? Giving people a chance to pick it up on sale or get to it in their backlog. (Not me you understand because i WILL never catch up on my backlog and you should ALWAYS assume I haven't played a game even if I pre-ordered it and got it on release day...like Assassin's Creed... I'm only on 2 but I own all of them...don't judge bitches!)

Indies? well they are smaller and you finish them faster...but! most people will ignore them to begin with...so.. a year? Unless you roll with a crowd that is really into them so you know they'll play them as they come, then the AAA rule applies, 6 months.

Do i think these numbers are exactly fair and 100% great, no. but I think they are at least some sort of guideline to being fair. Again... If you are talking to me, DISREGARD THAT. Assume I haven't played the game, I WILL dick punch you if you ruin the game for me btw. You've been warned.

Do you agree? Disagree? Have a better suggestion?

I need someone to explain FF7 to me

Specifically why it is that everyone loves it so much,  because, I don't get it.

The first Final Fantasy game I tried was FF10, I didn't get very far. Not because I didn't like it, but because I had never played a jrpg before and had no idea wtf I was doing. I got stuck and I stopped...I am now stuck again because...FUCK SEYMOUR! But I'll get through him one of these days.

After my failure at FF10 I decided I'd check what all the hype was about and I tried FF7....From the beginning I hated everything about it. I can't explain it. I just didn't like anything about it. I stuck it out for a while an then said fuck it and stopped.

I've tried every FF since that first failure at FF10. Some I've almost finished, some I stopped partway through. But there's only 3 of them I can honestly say I don't care if I ever go back to because I just can't stand them or their characters...FF7, FF8 and FF13.

Cloud, Aerith, Squall, Vanille, Hope, Lightning are just some of the few motherfuckers I wanna skullfuck every time I TRY to play one of these games.
Oddly enough I like Crisis Core...except all the parts I gotta deal with Aerith and Cloud. I don't even mind Angeal's whining or Genesis being...Genesis. But ugh Aerith and Cloud.
One of the first things I did when I got Dissidia was go through and beat the shit out of Cloud with every other character, lol.

But you know, I'm not ALL about hate.
I really like FF4. Cecil is awesome, so is Kain. So much so I forgive them for Palom and Porom.
FF9 is fucking boss! Zidane holds a special place in my heart.
I actually really like FF1 as well and I'd finish it if I could remember wtf I was doing when I left off.
Aside from the fact that Seymour is currently raping my ass, I like FF10, I damn well should, I dress up as Lulu enough.
I also enjoyed 3,5 and Revenant Wings (that's a spinoff of 12 because I couldn't get into 12. Vaan looks girly even by JRPG standards and I hate the battle system. Game does look absolutely gorgeous though).

Didn't care much for FF2 but that's more on not liking how leveling up and such works, not so much on the story or characters.

So please, someone explain to me why gamers all fall down and suck the dick of FF7 and FF8 because I don't get it at all.

I really don't get it

I want to apologize right at the start if the writing in this post is total shit and super awkward. Its been so long since I've actually sat down to write more than 2 sentences on Facebook that I think I've forgotten how to be coherent and fluid. Bear with me, I'm sure I'll get the hang of it again soon enough.

Today's rant shall be....

What's wrong with Handhelds?

Saturday my Vita copy of Final Fantasy X arrived. Of course I immediately cracked that bitch open and started playing. well, continued playing because cross saves are awesome!

As I was playing the game and putting it on standby every few minutes because...kids...dogs...life...I thought about how damn convenient it was. Every time one of my daughters started bitching or threatening to murder the other i just tapped the button on my Vita and put it down in order to threaten bodily harm to the little monsters. Every time my dog decided that he wanted back on the bed that he can't reach, even though I had put him up there 2 minutes ago and he promptly decided to jump off again, I could just put my Vita on standby and grab the little snot up. Snack break, bathroom break, FB break...whatever. Wake up from a nap, roll over and turn the damn thing on and carry on playing right where I left off.

I love my Vita.
I also love my 3DS, PSPs, DSLites and GBAs. At the moment if you look on my bed you'll find 2 PSPs, a case of memory cards and game cards, my Vita and my 3DS right next to my pillow.
Why the hell do I have all that on my bed?
Because i'm indecisive and have total gaming ADD. I'll bounce around from playing FF9 on my PSP to Danganronpa on my Vita to Fire Emblem on my 3DS (that one never lasts long since i suck at it and fail miserably every time i play) then I drop them all and read a little on my phone for a while (Finally on book 4 of A Song of Ice and Fire!).

When I go out I tend to carry a messenger bag with my girl shit (lipstick, phone, tampons, mints) and my handhelds...because you never know when you have 5 minutes to squeeze in some God of War.

So yes, I adore handhelds. I'm more likely to play a game on a handheld than I am a console, which is exactly why I bought a Vita copy of FFX even though I bought the PS3 version as well. I find the pick up and play nature of handhelds meshes well with my life...and its not even like I'm a person who is always on the go. If you know me you know I am a fucking hermit who hates leaving the house unless it is absolutely necessary. So I tend to play my handhelds at home 98% of the time....just a few feet away from my consoles...and my walls of games...because sometimes the only way I'll get to play something and make progress in it is if I can easily turn it on, turn it off and pause it at will even in the middle of a cutscene or battle.

Not much of a rant is it? I mean, you know me. My rants consist of enough Fbombs to nuke a planet and a lot of yelling and rabid foaming at the mouth. So far I've just verbally jerked off handhelds for a few minutes, haven't I?

You see, my rant isn't about why I think handhelds suck. Its about people constantly saying handhelds suck and their reactions to people who like them.

I bought my Vita for 1 game.
Assassin's Creed Liberation.
I bought the Collector's Edition Vita bundle with AC: Liberation.
I played the shit outta AC: Liberation and I really really enjoyed it. I even finished it...to date its the only AC game I have finished, though I own them all.

I heard THIS a lot when that game came out "It looks really good, too bad its on a handheld." "I'd play that if it was on a console" "why the fuck did they make that a handheld game?"
There was so much shit about it that the game finally got released on PS3.

But, that's just one game in thousands.
I've lost count of how many times that same damn whine has been thrown out there "I'd play it if it weren't on a handheld." "handhelds suck, why isn't X game coming out on consoles?"
How about you shut the fuck up and buy a damn handheld if you wanna play the game so badly?? (before anyone gets on my ass about  how expensive a handheld is and how you have no money..STFU, I'm a broke ass bitch with 3 kids and I managed to save up to buy a Vita and I own a shitload of games and consoles. If gaming is seriously THAT expensive for you then you should get a cheaper hobby)

I've been told before that handheld games don't count as "real" games. Well Persona 4 Golden says "fuck you too"

I swear if I could play my Xbox games on some sort of handheld I'd be the happiest bitch on the planet!
Currently when I'm not playing FFX on my Vita I'm playing FFIX on my PSP...Actually, I have FF1-10 between my PSP, Vita and DS that I play on and off. Its just...more convenient for me to play shit on handhelds and I imagine that if I actually had a life and left the house once in a while I'd find my handhelds even more indispensable. I've re-bought games I have on PC or Console on my Handhelds just for the convenience of it.

What is it that people hate about handhelds?
I've heard complaints of a small screen....Look people, I have astigmatism ffs, if it doesn't bother me then you can fucking live with it.
Then there's the complaint of hand cramps...Honestly, holding anything for a long period of time and doing a repetitive motion is going to cause pain. I get hand cramps from playing xbox too long and the 360 controller is built perfectly for my man hands. So, lets throw that one out too.

Here's the one I've heard the most and it makes me wanna start dick punching everyone around me...The graphics.
If your main concern is how shiny and pretty the games you play are then maybe you aren't really a gamer. Graphics do not equal quality. I'll take ugly with fabulous gameplay and good story over a shiny turd any day. But if you really wanna rag on graphics...Muramasa has a Katana it'd like to shove up your ass.
Then there's the argument that isn't solely reserved for handhelds I know, but its still made so it counts, they have no games.

That argument is again a giant crock of shit. As of right now both the Vita and the 3DS have over 500 games  each in their catalogs. If you don't think 500 games is more than enough games to find SOMETHING you will want to play then there's something seriously wrong with you and you should seek professional help because I'm just some ranty bitch on a PC and I can't help your kind of crazy.

Why the Hate?

I started playing Millenium a New Hope this morning...well til my PC made a horrible noise and crashed epically because its on its last leg. Shame too cause I was enjoying it. Its actually quite good and very pretty.

Though I will admit after a while the music was starting to REALLY irritate me. For some reason I decided to visit the forums on steam about the game, just to see what others thought and...as usual...people suck.

I feel the need to ask..whats with the RPG Maker games hate? Am I just weird? Cause I love the SHIT outta RPG Maker games. Corpse Party (like 3 different ones), Ao Oni, Mad Father (man that shit is good), Crooked Man (I swear I peed a little), Killer Bear...they're really enjoyable games to me. and those are just the ones I've played, I have a ton of them I want to play but haven't had a chance to get around to.

I recently bought RPG Maker just so I could play shit people put up on the Steam Workshop...because honestly, I wouldn't even know where to start making a game cause I'm just not that creative. I had no idea that people hated these games so passionately.

What exactly is the problem with them?

Oh look A game not meant for us, Let's be assholes.

So this is gonna probably be really RANTY and might even go incoherent when i start raging like a madwoman but...i'll try to contain myself.

This started a few weeks ago when i was looking around for Hakuoki info and stumbled on a short blurb on Joystiq about it. 

The title alone made me want to punch something... "Sexy Warrior Dating Sim Hakuoki: Stories of the Shinsengumi Coming To North America" 

Um..what??

Hakuoki is NOT a "dating sim" but whatever, I continue reading this font of misinformation which mentions how Memories of the Shinsengumi is going to be released in NA in an article written a month after Memories of the Shinsengumi WAS released in NA and find this sentence: "The Hakuoki series is part of the otome (female market-targeted) visual novel subgenre, offering a harem of cuddly warriors for players to woo in a 19th century Japanese setting".

Again...what??

The entire "article" is only 3 paragraphs and the only info on it offered is some dismissive bullshit about wooing cute boys. Words can't describe how much that pisses me off. Did they even bother to glance at the game? I'm guessing not. 

no mention of the fact that it is based on actual history? That these "cuddly warriors" were real men fighting a losing battle at the cusp of the Meiji Restoration? Of course not, that would imply the game might actually have some depth and you just can't have that in a girly little dating sim can you?

Look, I'm not gonna bullshit, I'm not gonna say the game is an accurate  historical depiction of these men, I'm not going to say that you aren't gonna try and win the heart of one of these guys throughout the game. What I am going to say is that there is so much more going on in this game than a girl picking a cute boy to hook up with. 

I'm not going to review the game because I already did that but I will point out here that the "romancing" is a lot more low key than anything the words "sexy warrior dating sim" implies. 

You gain the affection of the men based on your choices throughout the game and those choices are NOT romantic. I'd say that more than gaining their love, you gain their respect. You decide who to follow into battle, will you even go into battle or stay behind. Will you stand up to the villain or do as he says? 

You don't go out for ice cream, the guys don't bring you flowers and candy and tell you you're pretty. Hell they could have cut the "romance" out and it would still be a fabulous story. 

So now that I've defended the game near and dear to my heart I want to move on to the second half of this and yes, I have a point to all this, bear with my rambling style (you should be used to this by now).

A couple days ago I was browsing Steam and saw a Barbie game on there and wondered...wtf? Some guys on my friend list even had it on their wishlist which made me doubly wtf? But you know, whatever floats their boat. I moved on...Til yesterday when a friend sent me a link to a video on Giant Bomb where they did a "quick look" of this Barbie game. Apparently this came about because Rock, Paper, Shotgun had already done a feature on it.

I read the article and got halfway through the video before I felt that if i didn't stop i'd go full blown apeshit and start throwing things. 

Let's get one thing out of the way, I love Barbie dolls, always have. I have never played a barbie game and probably never will. Do I think this Barbie Dreamhouse game is good? From what I've seen I wouldn't play it or like it. HOWEVER, the game is not made for me. That's the thing. It wasn't made with a person like me in mind. 

I could sit here and bash its graphics, the voice acting, the gameplay but ultimately that would mean nothing at all. I think that little girls that like Barbie would probably really enjoy the game. 

I'm not going to even go into the whole crap about how Barbie makes girls have body image issues because frankly i find that a crock of shit and that's a whole different can of worms. 

My problem with these 2 sites and their coverage of the game is the same as Joystiq's coverage of Hakuoki. 

You don't understand it, you don't care about it and yet you waste everyone's time with your bullshit. 

As I suffered through the video I listened to these jackasses make snide comments about EVERYTHING. But, you know, I watch Zero Punctuation, I'm used to snide. It was the fact that they were making these inane and unnecessary comments attributing bs to the game that really got me. 

In one part there's a challenge to put on the outfit pieces shown and while these guys sift through skirts and boots they make comments like:

"If you're not wearing the right shoes you're pretty much garbage" 

"Also never eat, eating is for losers." 

"there's gotta be some fat shaming in here somewhere." 

"Isnt the whole thing fat shaming?" 

"Well yes but I meant more direct."

Afterwards when Barbie is explaining that the whole point of that minigame was that when you're a model you have to chance quickly and that fashion sometimes goes out of style in a flash, she suddenly gets up and changes her outfit which leads to these comments from the guys:

"Who told her that?"

"Her stomach, it was just grumbling at her because she never eats...all you eat is ice cubes and cotton balls"

Afterwards they choose the Kitchen as the next room in the house for a minigame with these comments:

"Kitchen i'm sure there's a a lot of positive messages there" (heavy sarcasm)

"No man will love you if you cant make a meal"

Now stop right there...

Who is making a commentary on the unrealistic expectations of society? The game that has girls picking out shoes to go with their skirt and making cupcakes? Or the douchebags making misogynistic comments in an attempt to be witty?

I don't find the GAME insulting to girls, I find these guys mocking it insulting. 

Fuck you very much, seriously. This wasn't clever. It wasn't funny. It was a bunch of jerks making fun of something that CLEARLY wasn't meant for them.

And there it is...

These games, they're outside of the scope of your average gamer, particularly your average male gamer.

Do I think a game like Barbie Dreamhouse should be reviewed, covered, whatever on a gaming site? 

I don't really know, I mean, I think that for the most part the parents buying it and the kids playing it are probably not people that would frequent such places. However, I know sometimes I want to read up on an obscure game and its frustrating not to be able to find some info on it. 

I can say with certainty however that if someone IS going to put out some info on a game like this it should be done fairly and honestly. It shouldn't be done with the mindset where you are LOOKING to find insult, or to make a mockery of it. 

The Barbie game is kind of a "special case" because its so obviously meant to insult the game...Which makes me wonder why? Why so much hate and negativity towards it? Did it piss in their Wheaties?

The Hakuoki one to me is in some ways worse, because it just shows that no one gave a fuck. Its just a chick game, whatever. Look it has Bishies...and the word "Romance" on the back....yeah yeah..sexy warrior dating, chuck it in the bin and lets move on to COD and Ass Creed. Its kind of a slap in the face how dismissive they are of it. 

Once upon a time I was like that. I remember with shame how i used to make fun of my daughter for playing Imagine games. Now I know how she felt. Being told something she really likes is stupid and she should play "real" games. 

As an experiment for this blog I stepped out of my comfort zone and tried her Imagine games and...it changed me. Not only did I apologize to her and tell her that if that's what she wanted to play then that was totally cool but that experience made me branch out as a gamer. There are so many great games I've played, like Hakuoki for one, that I would never have touched 5-6yrs ago. I probably would have cracked insulting jokes like an asshat too. But I grew up.

I'm not saying you can't dislike a game, I'm not saying you can't give it a bad review. I'm saying that when your ONLY view is to cut it down then you need to leave it the fuck alone. 

I'm saying that because games are geared at little girls or women or little boys or pre-schoolers or whatever it may be that you aren't, it doesn't mean the game is complete and utter garbage. It means it isn't meant for you and you won't appreciate it the way the people it IS geared to will. 

*I apologize for this being so long and being so...EVERYWHERE...its just thit shit like this really drives me up a wall.*

Hakuouki-- Came for the Bishies, Stayed for the AMAZING story

So a while back when Persona 2 Innocent Sin was released on PSP when i went to order it one of the suggested games under it was Hakuoki: Demon of the Fleeting Blossom CE. I had never heard of it, knew nothing about it but the cover looked pretty cool and I'm a sucker for a CE. On a whim I ordered it.
When it came in I cracked that puppy open and the art book was full of pretty bishies, yay me! But, the thought of a Visual Novel type game didn't really interest me much. After a couple of weeks on my shelf though, curiosity got the best of me.

The game falls into a genre called Otome, basically games for females. The set up is a reverse harem situation, if you're not familiar with anime/manga a harem situation is where a guy is surrounded by numerous women, usually but not always to comedic effect. In this case its the opposite, one girl, numerous guys. BUT...get your minds outta the gutter!!

The premise of the game is simple enough, you are Yukimura Chizuru, a girl who dresses up like a boy to come to Kyoto and search for her missing father. Your "harem" are the heroic and handsome men of the Shinsengumi, the last Samurai corps in Japan before the Meiji Restoration began.
Chizuru ends up stumbling across the Shinsengumi during their patrols and is taken back to their headquarters where she becomes first a prisoner, then a member and eventually a love interest for one of the men. That's where you, the player come in.
You have 5 possible romantic choices within the Shinsengumi and 1 other...gentleman...that comes along later and there's pretty much something for everyone. The strong silent type, the guy next door, the douchebag, whatever floats your boat.

Harada Sanosuke, Todo Heisuke, Kazama Chikage, Okita Souji, Saito Hajime, Hijikata Toshizo

The game is divided into chapters. The first 3 are dedicated to establishing the story and from chapter 4 onward you focus mainly on the guy you've chosen. If you've shown no preference for any of the 5 Shinsengumi characters by Ch4 the game defaults to Kazama Chikage, the only person outside the Shinsengumi you can pursue a romance with and I use the word romance loosely...

I would like to point out that while the object of the game is to win the heart of one of these men the game REALLY isn't all that focused on romance or love. I know that doesn't seem to make sense, bear with me, I'm trying to write this without being totally spoilerific. and yes, I'll just warn you right now, there will probably be some spoilers but that doesn't matter much really does it? I'm sure that many readers have no intention of ever playing through this game because its "girly". That's really a shame because to be honest I came for the pretty boys but I stayed for the amazing story. No, not the romance. The story of the Shinsengumi.

You see, turns out the Shinsengumi were real. They probably weren't that damn pretty (ok, except for Hijikata...he really WAS pretty) and they certainly weren't that warm and fuzzy but they were real, and the story in the game and the battles that they fight, those happened for the most part. Sure the game adds a girl and some demons (I'll get to that) but the basics are true. 

So I mentioned Demons...

(the demon called spoilers will probably appear from this moment onward)

Amagiri Kyuju, Kazama Chikage, Shiranui Kyo

Not very long into the game the Shinsengumi raid the Ikeda Inn (this was a very famous battle and the one that really catapulted them to fame in Kyoto) and have a run in with 3 strange men. One of them I've already mentioned, he's the 6th love interest, Kazama. Turns out they aren't just ordinary men but demons. For the duration of the game they'll pop up trying to kidnap Chizuru and start some shit with the Shinsengumi. While they fight all the members, each guy has his own specific demon that likes to show up and start shit. For example if you chose Harada as your romance then you'll be seeing a lot of Shiranui Kyo, the demon with the gun and the badass tattoo. (while Harada is not my first choice in the Shinsengumi I have an unnatural obsession with his Oni (demon) rival so I really enjoy his route).

Why are they trying to kidnap Chizuru? Because Kazama wants babies..yeah, there's more to it but you'll have to just play the game to find out.

The demons do have other reasons why they clash with the Shinsengumi, mostly because Kazama is a colossal dick, but, also because of a substance called Ochimizu (water of life). This liquid transforms a man into a Rasetsu (Fury). Kazama finds the Furies offensive and mocks those of the Shinsengumi who become furies.

Furies...

Basically its like..demon/vampire lite. Just one calorie, not bad ass enough. The Furies are stronger, faster and heal quicker than a normal person. However, they crave blood and slowly go mad. They also have a weakness to silver bullets. (i thought that was werewolves...)

Throughout the story all but 1 of your romantic options in the Shinsengumi become furies for one reason or another. Interesting little aside on that...reading up on the actual history of the group, I realized that the game cleverly has 3 characters turn into furies at the same time their historical counterpart died. I felt that was a nice touch. 

Ok, so now you know all this stuff about the game except one key element...gameplay. 

Well, there really isn't any...

The game is text accompanied by images of the characters and is fully voiced in Japanese (and the voice actors do an AMAZING JOB) and has the occasional CG stills. Gameplay consists of making dialogue choices. For the most part your choices affect your relationship status with the men. Either they determine who's romance level grows or by how much it grows. If the person you chose becomes a fury in the course of the game, not only will you have to keep an eye on your romance level with them but on their corruption level as well. 

MAKEOVERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The corruption level is a gauge that goes up every chapter they are a fury. Since furies crave blood, when your SO has an..episode.. you'll be given a choice: Give him the blood he needs, give him medicine to suppress his bloodlust or make him suck it up and endure the pain until it passes. each choice has an effect on corruption with giving them blood lowering it most and making them endure raising it highest. If their corruption gets too high, its game over. If you do manage to keep their corruption in check but don't get their romance level high enough by the end of the game then its game over as well. 

That all sounds well and good but you just don't really care about a visual novel type experience you say. First, I'll say that I felt the same way til I actually sat down to play it and then I couldn't put it down.

Second, if you want something less romance-y and more action-y but...not quite as good...still pretty good but not AS good...you could try Warriors of the Shinsengumi.

I actually JUST got around to finishing this one yesterday. When I first bought it I didn't really get into it but I've been on a MASSIVE Hakuoki kick recently and decided I'd give it another go. Glad I did because I could NOT put it down!

Warriors still offers the same basic story as Demon of the Fleeting Blossom but in a Dynasty Warriors crispy crunchy hordes of random dudes getting beat down style. You again choose one of the 6 heroes and spam your way through 6 chapters of faceless peon ass beatings. Along the way you collect materials to craft buffs and such and to unlock extras in the gallery and costumes for free play. It also offers a second story mode which is an original scenario that differs from the main story called Chronicles. Everyone gets a shiny new battle outfit and free flowing hair! 

Its not a particularly difficult game and it can be repetitive but its a fun little hack n slash and for those that have played the previous game or watched the anime (I'm getting to that) they added 2 unlockable characters for skirmish mode, Nagakura Shinpachi and Sanan Keisuke. I personally love Sanan-san so it was great to play as him even if he didn't get his own story arc.

Ok well, you don't like visual novels or Dynasty Warriors but it still sounds kinda cool? Go watch the Anime! It runs through the entire story, the romance is minimal and only with 1 character and there's actual action and blood! But, have a box of tissues on hand...that shit gets SAD. I bawled my eyes out. (man, I'm such a girl)

Look, its like this....I tend to not be a very girly girl when it comes to games. I don't go out of my way to be or not be girly, its just the way I am. I know that games geared at females tend to be..subpar... for the most part. I don't think I've actually ever sought one out on purpose and most are things I'd recommend everyone stay far away from. However, if you look on the right side of the screen there, you'll see that one of my most popular posts is a review of another "girly" game, Style Savvy. I chose to review that game and these because they AREN'T what people expect in a "girl" game. they're well thought out, well implemented and enjoyable. They SHOULDN'T be limited to females. You guys...everyone should give these games a try. Its sad that the fact they are considered "female games" will for the most part limit the amount of people who will play them. So, have an open mind y'all. I wouldn't steer you wrong.

Oh and in case anyone wondered who my favorite Hakuoki hunk to romance was?

Saito Hajime

I like the strong silent type :p

Corpse Party...I freely admit sleeping with the lights on.

So, I've actually been gaming lately instead of just thinking about gaming.
My consoles however are mostly covered in dust since I've been focusing more on handhelds for many many reasons. Mostly because there are some really great games on them.

Contrary to my nature I've found myself playing "horror" games. This is actually beyond contrary because I'm a giant wuss who gets scared quite easily. (I quit Dead Space at chapter 2 cause it was freaking me out too badly)

So I started with Corpse Party. I had heard it was pretty scary but when I started playing it what I saw were cute little chibi sprites. I actually laughed a little. How could this possibly be scary?
Well, not the first time I've been wrong about something. That game scared the bejesus out of me. The main thing that had me freaking out was the sound. Playing this with headphones on and the amazingly done binaural sound...its an experience.
I promise not to spoil the game for y'all but I'll give you a quick summary in case you've never heard of the game.

Corpse Party started off as a PC game made with RPGMaker and has kind of picked up a cult following. There are multiple fan made PC games which you can find here: http://www.memoriesoffear.com/games.html Including a remake of the original game. After finishing Repeated Fear (the PSP remake) I did start Corpse Party Rebuilt on PC but, I kind of missed the newer additions to the game and therefore kinda drifted off to play other things. But, I digress.

This summary will be based on the PSP version of the game that includes a few characters that were non-existent in the original and a slightly different background story.

They have no idea the mind fuck they're about to experience

The premise of the game is that you are a group of students from Kisaragi Academy who have gathered together after a school festival to clean up, tell ghost stories and say your goodbyes to a student who is transferring away. To cement your friendship you all participate in a chant called Sachiko Everafter which is supposed to guarantee your friendship for life and ensure you meet again. Instead it transports the students and a teacher to Heavenly Host Elementary School.

Heavenly Host Elementary school had been shut down and eventually torn down after a gruesome multiple murder had occurred on its grounds and eventually Kisaragi Academy was built on the grounds.

The students quickly find out that they aren't the first to end up there and that no one else has ever made it out. Your job is to find the others and find a way out of the haunted school while piecing together what happened there long ago.

Kishinuma-kun was my personal favorite character
& I spent half the game wanting to slap the hell out of Ayumi

Once I started, I could not put the game down...I also freely admit I slept with the lights on. Its hard to describe...its not that the game is really..scary...I mean it is but...
Ok, see the sprites aren't scary of course, but the cut to some gory CG images, the sounds, the text, the atmosphere...it does get to you and it stays with you long after you turn the game off. I swear I was hearing some creepy ghost bitch saying "SACHI...." for about a week after i stopped playing every time I turned the lights out, lol.

The game is told from the perspective of each of the different characters by jumping back and forth between their situations and so you become emotionally invested in everyone pretty much equally, though I do have my favorites. Seiko, who was not in the original game, is absolutely hysterical. Seriously, I'm gonna be quoting her forever. She adds some much needed levity to the game. I wish I could say the same for her partner Naomi who plays a very big part in the game and who I never really connected with me, but maybe I'm biased due to other things going on in the back story.

If I had to be stuck in a haunted school with someone
she would be my first choice.

While the game is slated as a "Survival Horror Adventure" its more Adventure than anything else. What I mean is if you're looking for action...look somewhere else. There are a few frustrating (well frustrating to me because I tend to panic) chases but thats pretty much as intense as the "gameplay" gets. its mostly dialogue (which is voiced in its original Japanese and incredibly well done) with some light puzzles scattered about.

If I have to say anything negative about the game it would be that some of the "wrong ends" you can get seem out of left field. In a game where exploring everything, looking at everything is crucial it seems unfair that if I look at the wrong thing I can end up dead suddenly. Some puzzles could do with being a bit more intuitive. But other than that, I loved every moment I spent in Heavenly Host elementary...even if I did cry a few times.

But the fun didn't end there....

There's a sequel! Corpse Party Book of Shadows!

Book of Shadows covered is a bit different from its predecessor. Its told in 8 separate vignettes and its also first person. BoS is a weird one...A lot of the chapters are "What If" situations. You replay key moments in the first game but by making different choices you can explore a different outcome. Other Chapters deal with backstories and expanding on the stories of characters you came across briefly in the first game. Should you manage to get through all of the good endings to these chapters you unlock the 8th and final chapter Blood Drive which sets you up for the upcoming sequel of the same name. I wish I could tell you more about it since its an utterly twisted and jaw dropping experience but, I don't wanna spoil it.

How I felt while playing Corpse Party

I enjoyed the story a lot in Book of Shadows but I don't know that I liked the first person thing too much. It felt claustrophobic, which i guess is good for a game of this nature but it also felt a bit limited. There is much less exploration in this game given the first person view and the way the chapters are set up and the overmap you use to navigate your character is a bit...awkward... but its still well worth the time and money and I'm looking forward to Blood Drive impatiently.

Lord its been months hasn't it?

I don't even know if anyone even comes here anymore. If you do, then, I apologize for neglecting this place.
Life had been dealing me heaps of shit to deal with and the hits keep coming. I've also gotten much more wrapped up in my Fb page...seems people tolerate me better in small bite size doses lol
I've also been gaming a lot, mostly on handhelds.

So I do have tons and tons and tons of shit I could talk about, and would like to talk about, problem is...where to start.

Um...for a while there I got utterly addicted to Corpse Party, don't know what that is? I'll do a little write up about it later.

I'm still struggling to finish Persona 4 Golden and I'm starting to believe that game is never ending..seriously...I cannot finish this damn game

If my writing seems rushed its because Im fighting against the clock here.
y'see idid get my PC fixed recently but...then my AC broke and its so damn hot that my Pc is overheating again. Not its fault...I'm fucking overheating here! lol
I hope the days cool off soon or my Ac gets fixed somehow because if not I might overheat for good.

I'll be back, promise...and it wont take me 2 months this time.

SO SORRY!!!

Borrowing my little monsters' PC right now just to say...No, I have not forgotten this place at all. Its taking me longer than I expected to scrape together the cash to fix my PC and so, most of the time I'm using my phone for all my internet needs. While its ok for reading stuff its a nightmare for writing anything more than a couple of sentences. My friend and now Co-admin on my FB page, Nocturne has been keeping shit going on my FB page....basically I am taking a sabbatical because A. I have no PC and B. Shit pissed me off but all that means is that I'm bombarding the poor guy with links to articles for him to post for me, cause i'm a pain in the ass...but a cute one. :p

I will hopefully get back online permanently soon, and I have some game codes I'll be posting here and on my FB page and some other stuff I've got planned, including some game reviews...don't expect me to review any hot new popular games, you know I never do :P
In a way I'm glad I wasn't on here for that whole Xbox One cluster fuck because my rants were epic and scary. For the record I preordered a PS4 but i'll probably cancel that...no not because I'm defecting to XboxOne but because I really don't think I want a launch console.
All a launch Console gives you is headaches and bragging rights.

So, I'll be back soon, thanks for sticking with me, if you REALLY need to hear me lose my shit on a more regular basis just click the top link there in the left hand column and head over to my FB page.

Looks like I'm gonna be busy next few days

Just stopping by to say hello. Been watching E3 all day and spamming my FB page with my thoughts. Sometime this week I'll come on here and share some thoughts once everything is over with.

I've been playing AC2, 999 and STILL on Persona 4 Golden lately.
My PC bit it and I'm really depressed about that so I'm sorry I haven't updated lately. Its coming soon...I'll also be doing some little reviews of older games as well.

See you guys soon! Feel free to drop by my Fb page and share your thoughts on anything at all.

I'm disgusted to be a gamer

That's rather a fucked up statement isn't it?
But, its true.
Right now, at this moment, I'm utterly disgusted at the fact that I'm a gamer.
Care to guess why?
Eh, no need, obviously, I'm going to tell you why.
The thing is, I'm trying to figure out where to start. I don't want to write a novella.
None of what I'm going to say is new. Bitching about it won't change it. But whatever, its my party and I'll bitch if i want to.

What I'm pissed about is female gamers; female gamers and hypocrisy and bullshit.

I wanna start it off by saying something that will probably offend some people (when do I not offend people):  To the guys who call us "sluts with controllers" or make kitchen and sandwich jokes...fuck you, no really, go fuck yourself thoroughly in the ass with a 6 foot splintery pole. I'm sure there's a special place in hell for assholes like you. But, I expect that bullshit from the caveman boys club mentality so I'm not gonna waste anymore time on you.

Bitches.
Bitches is what I wanna talk about.
This is gonna touch on my post from the other day about social media as well.

Because my PC is now tragically deceased, I've had to amuse myself on my phone more often. The other night I was in Instagram and there was a poll of sorts. "Ladies are you a gamer girl or a gamer?" This was accompanied with a bit of text depicting a vacuous "gamer girl" giggling and flirting and a "real" gamer bitching about Rainbow Road.
This isn't a new topic, this isn't a new spin on it.
I commented that I am either/or. I don't care which term is used as long as people are respectful. Other...ladies were a bit less honest and a bit less diplomatic in their replies.
The whole thing was a slew of women replying that they are GAMERS!!!!! because they're REAL and SERIOUS.
Now, I'm not doubting them. Because frankly, I don't really give a tiny rats ass what you play or how often. What DID bother me is that these women accuse anyone that uses the term "gamer girl" as being a fake, shallow attention whore...let me reiterate...this was on INSTAGRAM.

Instagram, land of attention whoring. Why the hell else do people post selfies and their food and their dog and their games and their nails if not to dhow them off and have people "like" them?
There is NOTHING wrong with that. I do it, lots of people I know do it, we like showing off our stuff and having people admire it. That's pretty normal human behavior.
But to be on Instagram calling others attention whores seems ridiculous. Not only that but...(and yes, I checked) most of these women tag their pics with #girlgamer #gamergirl, #gamerchick, #girlsthatgame.
AGAIN, NOTHING wrong with that but, doesn't it make you a bit of a hypocrite to call women who are "gamergirls" shallow attention whores while you are on Instagram and tagging your pics with every variation of "female that plays games"??

I posted a follow up reply to that effect and as expected it was summarily deleted.

24 hours later I'm perusing my Instagram feed which is full of pics of ladies in various states of dress and undress holding games, controllers, plushes or whatever. Showing off their COD stats or their WOW characters. If I see a pic of a girl with a nice collection, or a cool character or whatever, I'll give it a like, its what you do on IG. Especially when you follow places that are all about shoutouts.
But then I come across one where someone comments that someone who only plays 1 game/series isn't really a gamer.
Who exactly made up those rules?
I was in a shit mood so I replied that people define shit differently, if they play a game they are by definition a "gamer" and why does it matter so much to others.

What followed were 2 women who were DETERMINED...on INSTAGRAM...on a FEMALE GAMER SHOUTOUT PAGE to prove that women who only play CoD or who take a pic with a controller are posers and use games as eharmony (that was actually said by one of them).

Lets get one thing clear....I LOATHE Call of Duty. With a PASSION. LOATHE.
Why?
I don't like war games.
I find it boring.
I think a 5hr campaign for $60 is ludicrous.
I don't like MP.
I don't really like very many FPS games to begin with.

But what I loathe more than CoD is people who like to insult others for the hell of it. I loathe people who jump on bandwagons, and have a bully/mob mentality. I hate those that make others feel small because they think they are somehow better.
Oh, are you looking at me and every single word I say?
Hypocrisy I guess.
Or maybe, I back myself up with actual facts. Maybe I fight for shit that is actually important. I mean, it impacts my life not at all if Betty Lou and Buffy run around in Assassin's Creed shirts and don't fucking know the difference between Ezio and Altair. Is it a bit irksome, since |I am mildly obsessed with Ezio? Yeah, I guess, in the way that Florida heat is irksome. Its there, its annoying but if I remove myself from it, my life continues uninterrupted.

If, there were only 1 copy of lets say...The Witcher 2 in the world. If this one copy was in front of me for sale and before I could take it in my hand another person, any person, swooped in out of nowhere, grabbed it and bought it because "oh, the person who buys it will be showered with applause when they walk out of the store and be featured in the local paper" and had no intention of ever actually opening the case, much less  playing the game..yeah, I'd be fucking livid. I'd probably curb stomp the asshole and pry the game out of their hand.
But you see..there ISN'T only 1 copy of the game, of any game, and only 1 copy in the world. Therefore, who plays a game and who just holds the box in their hand affects my gameplay not at all.

But, you may argue, Fake Girls ruin it for REAL girls. People don't take us seriously.
Yeah, that sucks, it does. I know, I go through the annoyance of being treated like an imbecile because some guys assume girls don't play games.

Do you REALLY think that has anything to do with an army of fake girls?
If you do, let me be really blunt, you're a moron.

By and large the men who condescend and who assume women don't play games are small minded, sexist and sometimes flat out misogynistic.
Gaming has been a "boys club" traditionally. That mentality is still going strong. Because you see, Gaming is in its infancy compared to other forms of media.
Not so long ago if a woman wanted her novel to be taken seriously she'd have to publish it under a male pseudonym. I'm not talking about the dark ages either. I'm talking a couple centuries ago...So why would you think that gaming would be any different.

The tides are changing, but they change slowly and its frustrating and its aggravating and its disheartening. I understand that. I'm subjected to the same insults and ridicule. Its why I have an almost clinical phobia of online multiplayer.

But baring your claws at other women isn't going to change anything, at least not for the better.
What it actually does is give these closed minded people something to point at and go "yeah, THIS".
If we spend our time insulting ourselves, trying to unmask the fake and prove how real we are. If we aren't willing to give the benefit of the doubt...why the fuck should the gaming industry? Why should the male gamers that have cherished their toys so long?

Real, Fake, Hardcore, Casual, Gamergirl, Gamer...I'm still gonna spend every dime I can on games and I'm still gonna play and rage and laugh and cry. What I'm not going to do is take time out from MY gaming to go on a crusade to unmask the "fakes" to make myself look "real"

Bitches be trippin'
don't be a bitch.

Inquisitor...Fuck that static!

I apologize...this is a repost of something I just wrote on FB. When I started writing it there it was just gonna be a little blurb and instead turned into a full blown rant and..well you guys know this is where I come to rant...

A while back I bought a game on GOG called Inquisitor, I just saw to day that its been greenlit on Steam.

I have to say that while I utterly loathed this game...not because it was hard (which it is) but because it was fucking boring as all get out..I didn't begrudge it the oh I don't remember I think I paid $10 for it. I mean, I've bought shittier games that I will never play, some of them more than once (don't ask me why).

No, the reason I am starting to REALLY regret my purchase is because the developer comes off as a total prick.

You see, I decided to see what people were saying about it on the Greenlight page and right away I saw the dev being kinda snippy.

Then I clicked on one of the "featured discussions" and that's when it got...interesting.

http://steamcommunity.com/workshop/filedetails/discussion/92965329/846946588482043305/

When someone gave reasons why they didn't like it the dev just showed a "good" review of his game.

when someone suggested that the game perhaps needed a bit of balancing the dev turned it around on the person with this remark:

"When dying almost 100 times, couldn't it mean that the player is doing something wrong?"

I think that dying a lot in a game probably does mean you suck...however games have a learning curve and I would think after a while you get further along without dying. If someone is dying 100 times in your game...maybe the game COULD use a little balancing.

I stopped there in the conversation because...well because it was pissing me off and reminded me of my own little run in with an indie dev...

Some of you might remember that if you ever checked out my blog.. Hack Slash Loot. 

The game is god awful and so I called it god awful with many creative words. The dev graced my blog with their presence (anonymously of course) to tell me that I was "butthurt" that I sucked at their game.

I then went on a little fishing trip and found quite a few people that shared my opinion (even if they did do it with classier words and longer reviews)

I'm all for Indie devs getting their shot. I'm all for devs in general putting out their creative vision and I understand not all games are for everyone.

What I am NOT for is devs with condescending and insulting attitudes thinking they deserve an ass-kissing or that you just aren't worthy of their magnificence.

So..Fuck you Inquisitor...right along with HSL.

~Sihaya

Time to get Anti-Social!

A couple weeks ago I started working on a blog post that I never finished (big surprise there from the Queen of Procrastination).
As usual it was a rambly mess but the broad strokes were about our current need to share everything.
Aw hell, I'm just gonna go ahead and post here what I had written and go from there because thanks to Microsoft and the Xbox One I have more to add to it.

When I go out for a smoke I get bored easily. I'm a slow smoker. Takes me like 15 minutes to smoke a cigarette. Those are my 15 minutes of quiet time in a house full of chaos. To fill those minutes I usually take one of the following:
A book, a DS, PSP, Vita or phone.
Lately my phone has been winning. What do I do while on my phone? Why play Candy Crush Saga of course.
If you don't know what Candy Crush Saga is, its a match three type game where you match little candies in increasingly shitty game boards with a limited number of moves. When you run out of moves and lives you have the option of buying more or asking your friends on Facebook for more moves.
I'm not going to go into the whole pay to play thing at the moment, what I wanna talk about is the whole "bug your Facebook friends for more moves" aspect, just not in the way you think.
No, I'm not gonna talk about how no one wants those stupid requests clogging up their feeds, lets talk about the whole "social" thing that those requests are a part of.

Let me back it up a bit more though...

Long Long ago, before the internet and during its infancy we played video games and as long as we've played games we've been competitive.
Whether you were leaving your initials next to your high score at the arcade or laughing at your friend sitting next to you on the couch because you got farther in Mario Bros. We've bragged, we've shared, we've tried to outdo each other.
Being competitive is part of our nature, being social is part of our nature but in this day and age we've gotten hooked on sharing and bragging about the completely unnecessary.

Don't think I'm saying this as someone above it all. I'm just as guilty as the rest. This isn't a condemnation, but more of an observation and i'll be sharing some of the moments where I have caught myself in the midst of that ridiculous need to show and tell. (not talking about the time I felt the need to share my Shamrock shake, moments even more ridiculous...if that's possible)

Today I got Thor God of Thunder in the mail (I have an unhealthy obsession with Loki) and what did I do after ripping into the packaging and removing my loot? I took a pic and posted it on Instagram and Facebook to share with the world.

So where I was going with that is that much like everyone else these days I'm a social media attention whore.  Thanks to all these sites and smartphones we share everything from new games to our fucking lunch and its getting ridiculous. When I turn my Xbox on it tells me how many friends are online and what they are playing.   When I log onto an MMO as I'm playing I get pop ups on my screen telling me "chubbo the lonely just created the gloves of greasy doom +5" even though I have no fucking idea who that is or why I should care.

There are a billion sites dedicated to sharing your business and specifically for gamers to share their business. I'm a member of a few...Raptr, Playfire, Metagamerscore, Trueachievements...probably more that I joined and never go to.That isn't counting the fact that consoles allow you to see your friends stats, send messages etc. Plus these sites link up to facebook and twitter and instagram and all sorts of other shit.

But, do we REALLY need all this?
Do you need to know that my kids and I watched 64 episodes of Invader Zim?
Do I need to know you unlocked an achievement for 100 headshots?
Do we need our entire lives chronicled and shared 24/7?

As I said, we are social creatures and we like sharing but...have we become obsessed with it? and is that healthy?

So, the new Xbox was revealed on the 21st.
I will start this by saying... DO NOT WANT.
I have a billion reasons for this but that's not an issue at the moment. Well, most of it isn't.
The one thing that IS relevant to this topic is...well most of the reveal.

Some things that stood out were the requirement for the kinect at all times, the requirement to be always on and before you jump down my throat about how it doesn't need to be ALWAYS on and only needs to connect once in a 24hour period..that's just splitting hairs. That is basically needing to be connected always, and the one that really gets me...Trending.

Trending...we already have this everywhere, including the current Xbox. A place we can see what's hot, what people are playing, watching, doing. Its spread out through the different areas of XBL but its there and I don't care for it.

I'm gonna say it right now, Most of the time, I don't give a tiny rat's ass what the fuck other people are doing and I don't think they care what I'm doing. Do we need an entire area of this consoles UI dedicated to shit others are doing? Do I need my console reporting to Microsoft and the world every little thing I do? Does the Kinect really need to be plugged in all the time? How do I know that shit isn't gonna watch me while I dance naked with a mop?

We share too goddamn much already. This blog itself is a study in attention whoring to the max. Its all about me, me, me and more fucking me.

I have friends that won't play certain PC games because they don't offer achievements on Steam for them to show off.
I have friends that won't play Ps2 or other older consoles anymore because they can't show people what they are playing or how many hours they've put into a game.
Since when did gaming become more about showing off than it did about playing games for entertainment and enjoyment?

This new Xbox is perpetuating and encouraging this kind of shallow attention whore behavior and we're all buying into it. We are cheerfully handing over our privacy and even compromising our own self and personalities (how many times have I heard people say "oh I won't watch/play that because I don't want it coming up on my feed where other people can see it" even if its something they want to watch/play) just for the hopes that someone will think we are cool because of what we play/watch/listen to.

Worst part is, we are ALL buying into this over-sharing society, even me, I don't count myself above it all or whatnot.
I'm not really sure where all this is going but its not going anywhere good. We are changing in subtle ways, seeking approval from others more than before, giving away our individuality and our privacy gladly and while it seems so trivial now, where will it go?

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go post a pic of my breakfast on instagram, I'm  sure others are DYING to see my cup of coffee and Nutragrain bar and can't find  meaning in their day til they have seen them.

Been working on something but its not done yet so enjoy this instead

So, I recently bought Thor God of Thunder, you know, the movie tie in game to Thor. Reviews say its utter and complete shit.  Gave it a 2.0. blah blah.
I don't listen to reviews.
But it is a movie tie in game so its probably gonna suck.
Started playing it last night.
Really fucking enjoyed it. Color me shocked.

So today, thanks to Raptr and Playfire and all those other lovely social sites everyone knows I played it. and everyone is telling me it sucks. And I'm fucking sick of it. Because well, who are they to tell me what to play or not play, like or dislike?
After I ranted on FB about it, I decided to check out my collection of games for other  crappy games.
I posted this on fb and now I'm posting it here.



So, I decided to browse a bit of my game collection see how it rates. Most of the shit on my collection is so not popular it was never reviewed by like Gamespot or whatever but there's plenty of 4.0 and below.
Lowest rating:

Thor (of course) at a 2.0
Xena Warrior Princess 2.8

Xena was pretty meh. it was a really really bare fighting game...I loved the shit out of it back in the day, cause.. Xena...FUCK YEAH!

Soul Calibur Legends 3.5

I almost dislocated my fucking shoulder swinging my Wiimote playing this. Good times. I can't tell you the story...I totally skipped all the talking cause it was lame. But the flailing like a retard was super fun.

Lux Pain 3.5

LOVED this game so much. I actually reviewed this on my blog when it came out. Its got some bad things but overall, its so worth playing.

Dynasty Warriors 6, Warriors Orochi, Warriors Oroch 2 4.0

Yeah...well these are love or hate from what I've seen. I love em.

Gauntlet Legends, Gauntlet Dark Legacy 4.3

I can't begin to tell you how many damn hours I spent playing Legends on N64 and later Legacy on PS2. Can't decide if I hate the Ice or Poison world more and Fuck you Chimera!

Blade Kitten 4.5

I
Love
This
Game
I suck at platforming but I don't care. I love everything about this game and I'm pissed that it sold badly because I need the next episode!
Kit is adorable, the game is adorable, it was fun as hell thought sometimes it made me cry and it took me forever to figure out how to fight the final boss but I did it and I finished the damn thing!

I could go on but that's enough.
I have plenty of high rated games too, and they're great. But that doesn't mean that anything scoring lower than a 7 is terrible or that reviewers are infallible.
Everyone has different tastes and my taste might suck but its mine and apparently they make shitty games just for people with bad taste like me.

I don't go tell you that what you play sucks whether I think it does or not, so, don't do that shit to me.
You wanna discuss and debate the good and bad points of a game, sure, no problem.
You wanna be a dick? move along.

This is gonna be all over the place

So, I don't have the brain power to write one coherent post about anything so, I'm just gonna blab about whatever for a bit.

Been playing mostly Vita lately, I really love that damn thing.

So lets see, I stepped away from Persona 4 for a bit, though I love t he hell out of that game. I'd seriously be hard pressed to say who my favorite character is, I love em all...except Rise, she fucking irks me with her cutesy slutty ways.

Tried the demo for Sumioni...its quite pretty but, I feel I need more hands. Way too much shit going on. move with the analog stick or d-pad, X to attack, slash the screen to draw ledges, press the little water symbol on the corner to turn the ink into water to then touch the screen and destroy projectiles, press L to switch to the magic screen and then slash the screen to then hit L again so that the ink becomes fire...Fuck that shit, I'm too damn awkward and spazzy to do all that. so, thinking I'm gonna have to pass on it.

Next I started Uncharted Fight for Fortune, if you've never heard of it, well not surprising. Its a card game. I ain't got no game! I seriously have ZERO strategy at shit like this yet I found myself really enjoying it and playing for a while. Probably play a little more today.

Because PS+ put SC Broken Destiny up free I decided, hey what the hell and downloaded it. Man I had forgotten what utter shit that game is. No actual story mode, just challenges which I suck at because I button mash or quick matches. Not to mention how absolutely hideous the game is. Even the original SC on XBL looks better. Its just one blurry pixelated mess. I actually thought maybe my screen was dirty at first, but no, the game is just fugly. Oh well, I could use the space, my memory card is almost full so, time to hit delete on that.

Also tried playing some AC Liberation. Its a pretty game and the action is good enough but...so far I can't discern any story whatsoever. I also have a big problem with the whole costume change mechanic. On one hand, its pretty cool, different outfits to get you into different places. On the other hand its an utter pain in the ass and feels likes its only there to pad out the game. Do something as the lady and my notoriety goes up, but unlike say AC 2 where I pay heralds and rip down posters to lower it I have to instead run around town shanking witnesses, but not as the lady cause there are ALWAYS witnesses around so I have to do it as the slave, then the slave notoriety goes up, so then I have to run around ripping down posters to lower that. Too much time running around lowering notoriety, not enough time actually forwarding the story, well if I could find a story. Also, I cannot stand the French and Spanish accents. I LOVE playing AC2 cause I love the Italian accents going on but...this game...a "Spanish" Captain was talking to a French Governor and I wanted to stab a pencil in my ears. Thickest Spanish accent I can think of is Antonio Banderas and his accent isn't a third as painful. I mean seriously we do NOT roll our damn Rs THAT hard.

what else...Oh yeah, I got Soul Hackers for DS, haven't played very much of it yet but so far I dig it. While aside from 3D its pretty much a direct port of the game it still looks pretty decent and I'm already interested in knowing wtf is going on with the story so yay. Hopefully I'll get to put a bit more time into that soon. Still haven't gotten back to Mirror of Fate either.

Played some Dynasty Warriors Next as well. I really love all that wholesome DW hack n slash. Just slaughtering a shitload of dudes with a damn fan or whatever. What I DO NOT like is the Duel mechanic on the Vita. So, every so often you run into an important officer and you have to engage in a rubbing match.
you slash the screen this way and that trying to land a hit or break their guard, you hold down a finger on the screen to block and when you beat them down enough you rub the screen furiously back and forth til you fill up the gauge and then lay the smackdown on their candy ass and...it seems there is no rhyme or reason as to what your character will do. Some times I just slash away til their dead, sometimes I can't catch a break and they just smack me 3 times in a row and I'm dead. There's no way to skip the duels or control them any other way beyond furious slashing on the touchscreen. It ruins a perfectly good game. To make matters worse if you play the campaign every so often you'll get a random ass duel challenge from another player and you can't opt out of that shit you have to do it. Really kills my buzz when I'm just trying to get my damn conquest on.
On that note I tried Warriors Orochi 3 finally this weekend, I had forgotten I had bought it a month or so ago. I didn't play much because I was getting bombarded with texts and shit from people (yeah the one day I decide to play a game I become popular. most of the time people don't even know I exist.) I have to say I did not like the bit I played and I love the shit out of the series. I've played 1 &2 both on Xbox and PSP. The whole 3 character switching hacky slashy goodness was there but the very first map I had to fight a Hydra...WHAT? Yeah well I got my ass beat down. Then they added that whole camp/hub thing from Strikeforce. You know the place to go to talk to your officers and to upgrade your weapon and such. I don't know, I'm just not feeling it. I quit right after I got to camp, but I'm sure i'll try again at some point.

I tried to play Assassin's Creed 2 some more but I didn't make much progress, its just too much fun running around finding treasures and doing assassination side missions to bother with the main story yet. I skip the races and shit though cause I fucking suck at them.

After finishing Bioshock I went on over to Gears Judgment just to try and knock that outta the way but...I hate that game so damn much. I just can't get over my dislike of...well everything about it. I don't know, I don't think I'm gonna be able to finish it.

I've also been attempting to get in a bit better shape by playing Dance Central 3. Ok, make fun of Kinect and DC all you want but that shit is FUN. Seriously fun. Its also exhausting, I'm half dead by the time i finish my playlist and damn if I'm not sure as hell the next day. Guess its working.

I'm sure there's a ton of other shit I was gonna say but I'm tired and old and I forget things. If it comes to me I'll post it later.