Monday, April 2, 2012 I...FAKE?????

So a couple days ago I was reading an article on Kotaku about an article in Forbes denouncing the "fake geek girl"
After skimming through the article and the comments I had some thoughts in the matter.
How do you actually decide a fake geek girl from the real thing? Is there really some sort of Checklist or test?
From what I gathered reading that trainwreck a "real" geek girl has a deep and extensive grasp of whatever material they are "geeking" on, be it sci fi movies, video games, Manga and/or anime.

I'm gonna be honest, I am absolutely fed up with all the labels and stereotypes and bullshit.
I don't have this long pedigree of gaming knowledge. I never liked gaming when i was younger, so I didnt game much.
I don't know a lot of technical terms, game engines, or even most of the names of creators, developers, studios etc.
I haven't finished most the games I own, and I probably never will.
I don't the names or the stories behind all the X-men, I haven't watched a grand majority of the "popular" animes. I still haven't touched the first Haruhi light novel.
I like Gackt, but I don't know the names of that many J-pop singers beyond him.

So am I faking it?
Am I doing it for attention?

In a way, I guess I am, but not for the type of attention "fake geek girls" are accused of seeking.
I'm not trying to pick up guys, I'm not trying to impress anyone with "OHH look at me, I am a rare and mythical creature of grace and beauty, a Geek/Gamer Girl"

When I go out and I'm not sporting slightly revealing and inappropriate outfits such as this one:

I'm wearing jeans and some sort of T-shirt related to gaming or movies or TV shows, like the stuff in my previous post. 
I wear Anime jewelry, game jewelry and the like as well.
What attention am I seeking?
Kindred spirits.
I like meeting and talking to other gamers. I love talking about games with anyone, constantly. So, since I can't just walk around stopping people and asking "do you game? do you watch FMA?" "do you collect action figures?" Dressing in clothing relating to my hobbies helps find people who share these interests with me. 
A long time ago, I used to use the FF7 Victory Fanfare as my ringtone. It went off one day at the 7-11 and the guy ringing me up commented on it, asked where I got it and which FF game I liked best. Fora year while my daughter was going to pre-school I would stop at that 7-11 for coffee, cigarettes and a chat about gaming with the cashier. 

I've had great conversations with random people at the mall, at stores, at festivals because we happened
to bump into each other, looked and realized "hey I have that shirt/necklace" or "I love that game/show/book".

So yeah, I dress geeky to attract attention and I don't see that as a negative.

Now that' that's cleared up, what about the whole deep extensive knowledge of the object of geekitude.
How much does one need to know to be a "real" geek girl?
How many games must I own and complete? How far in advance should I know of games that are slated for release? How many industry bigwig's names should I know and drop in conversation? Who decides what and what isn't geeky enough to be "legit"?

I might not know all the answers, or even half the answers, all I know is that I love collecting games, I love playing games, I love action figures and sometimes watch a few animes. I don't go a day without gaming in some way whether on a console or just on my phone. I drive my husband crazy and bore him to tears describing all the little things about the current game I'm playing, things that mean nothing to him at all, because I can't contain myself. I want to share my experiences in these games.

I also wonder, has it ever occurred to people like the author of the article or the people who wrote in the comments section that...maybe, these "fake geek girls" aren't fake at all? They are just new?
Everyone has to start somewhere right?
I'm not saying some girls do fake it for attention but...that's true of many people, in many things. It isnt exclusive to women or nerds.
Maybe some of these "fake" girls wanted to know more, to get into gaming or comics or whatever but after facing "nerd rage" for being "fake" they decided it wasnt worth it.

I guess my point is. Give people a damn chance, stop making snap judgements. Just because someone doesn't love or know something as well as you do, doesn't mean they are lying about their "nerd cred".

This goes into a bit of a broader issue which I could spend days writing about, but this is long enough  so I will keep it brief.
All this crap about fake girls, attention whores, fake really highlights a few of the complaints I see time and time again on gaming forums.

The first one is that Gamers/Geeks/Nerds whatever you wanna call yourself get a bum rap by society. They cry and whine and rage about being misunderstood, about not being accepted for who they are and what they love. They rage about people making snap judgements and accusations against the gaming community in general.
They ask for Tolerance, Understanding and Acceptance.

Yet for all that they aren't that far removed from a high school clique. Its the Geek club and you aren't allowed. You're a noob and you suck and we don't want you to be a part of our world.

The second thing that they cry and whine about is that they can't find a girl who loves their hobby or understands it. I hear so many "my wife/girlfriend bitches at me for playing too much" "She doesn't understand my hobby" "I had to cut down on gaming because of her" I tried to get her into it and she thought the game was stupid" "I'd love to find a girl who loves to game the same way I do" "girl gamers don't exist, I've yet to meet one"

But when a girl who shows interest in these things appear, she is treated at best as a  poor pathetic girl that needs you to go easy on her in a game, and at worst as a poser,a liar and an attention whoring moron who  can't possibly truly be into these hobbies.

How can you complain about society's lack of understanding, how can you expect the community to grow and prove its worth when you are too busy pecking away at each other? Gamers become the very things they claim to despise. and female gamers because silent, hide who they are online, becoming these mythological beings for fear of being torn down by the same community that clamors for more females to get involved.

Labels are for files, not for people.

Gamers of both sexes need to stop wasting their time and effort on belittling each other, coming up with terms and conditions for approval and instead accept each other, and work together to show that they aren't one of the cliques, that they aren't what society paints them to be.

The fake ones of either sex, will weed themselves out. You lose the opportunity for growth, friendship and the exchange of ideas when you spend your time splintering off the community into factions, demanding "geek cred" etc.

This is something that infuriates me to no end. I talked about it once before in a post about Hardcore vs Casual gamers.

your thoughts?


So apparently word verification here on blogger has been acting up and a friend had trouble getting her comment to show up. Its a great comment and I'm gonna post it here because I think it should be read by all.

I hate labels as much as you do. People like to categorize people. For some reason, it's their way of 'maintaining order' when they're able to stick you into a specific category. And if you don't belong to any, you get shunned, ostracized, etc. Or in this case, labeled a 'fake'. Just because you don't know everything there is to know about the stuff you're geeking on doesn't necessarily mean you're faking it. On the contrary, if you actually knew everything there is to know about that, I'd have to call you 'Google'. Or better yet, NUTS.


Anonymous said...

media crap

SihayatheFremen said...

not sure if you are referring to my post or the subject

Anonymous said...


s4ndm4n said...

You are without a doubt, the geekiest gamer chick I know online or offline, and I don't care what that stupid self-appointed authority says. Ugh. I hate that media crap. :)

SihayatheFremen said...

Heh! I wouldn't consider myself the geekiest, or even ONE of the geekiest but, I'm definitely somewhere on the geek spectrum :P

Its just that this shit is getting outta control.

Casual gamers vs Hardcore gamers

Gamer girls vs girls that game

now its fake geek girls vs real geek girls.

Don't we have more important shit to worry about?
How about we all band together and be people who demand games stop sucking.
Maybe we all become people who don't give a shit what labels and categories to place on people because we're too busy doing what we love to do to whatever degree we love know?

and maybe if places like Kotaku would stop bringing this up at least once a week every week, it would stop being such an issue.

s4ndm4n said...

::: stands up and applauds :::

Ummm Agreed. Love your passion when you stand up for whatever it is you think.. why I always follow your blog even though I haven't been able to play a da** thing for over a week since my ps3 is currently gone (again).. lol.

I might add "maybe we all become people who band together to get Kotaku to stop posting stuff like that every week by saying so or just not reading their stupid opinionated crap anymore?" hehe.

s4ndm4n said...

OH and I said "geekiest gamer chick I KNOW..." I realize there may be others more geeky but as for the ones I know personally both online and off you've won the ribbon from me. :)

SihayatheFremen said...

best bet would be to stop reading Kotaku I think. They are all about the page views anyway. one day is all about the virtues of feminism and intelligent portrayals of women in games and the next day its "check out these cosplayers tits!!!"

I should stop going there, might be better for my blood pressure lol

SihayatheFremen said...

OOH I love ribbons and awards!! :P

s4ndm4n said...

:: hands many ribbons to Sihaya :: LOL

yes I get fed up with some of the sites like kotaku and just don't read them anymore..

Jim said...

you shouldn't worry because some nitwit like to make fun of people. I Have a 30 year old daughter, three nieces and a nephew in college and I love to talk about video games as much as and probably more then anything else.

there is nothing wrong with it the guys who make fun of use are the ones with a problem, right?