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Friday, October 5, 2012

Review: Hack Slash Loot


 Hack Slash and Loot is like the original Legend of Zelda, if it had sucked balls. Permadeath, no inventory, tiny window, horribly pixelated "old skool" wannabe graphics that make everything look like little spiky smears.
Anything you find you must pick it up then and there or not. Including health or food.

I played a bit as an Archer (don't do that, unless you wanna die within 5 seconds) and as a Saracen (that one lasted 5 whole MINUTES)

what can I say about this utterly craptasticly fugly mess?
KILL IT WITH FIRE!

You know what? 
Fuck this game...right up the ass..with a 12 foot dildo and no lube. 

I'm sure there are plenty who will claim the charming nostalgia of ugly graphics and the utter lack of even a lives system and you know what I say to them? bite me pretentious ass. Because I really cannot comprehend how anyone would think this was worth their money or time.

Here's a trailer...that pretty much all I can say about it.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Butthurt because you're no good at the game :/

Sihaya Atreides said...

Haha that's cute coming from someone who hides behind anonymity

s4ndm4n said...

Funny that anonymous says butthurt when you're post is all about how freakishly ugly the game is and not about gameplay much.

Sihaya Atreides said...

well it is an incredibly fugly game. the best i can say is that the background they use next to the gameplay is cute...too bad nothing in the game resembles that.

and you know what? I've searched online..a LOT... most of the reviews of this game have called it shit. its random, there's no strategy, its tiny and its butt ugly.

So they can accuse me of being butthurt all they want. truth is they put out a bad game and now they have to suck it up.